Awww, wook at da cuddly wuddle bears, OH GOD KILL THEM KILL THEM!

Darwin doesn’t account for this. But maybe he does explain this.

In other news, 00.1% of population die under mysterious circumstances. By mysterious circumstances, I mean probably executed.

So apparently there was a nuclear apocalypse in Detroit but no one noticed.

The title for the next Nic Cage movie should just be called, Nic Cage: I Don’t Give a F***. For a deeper look into his lack of a f***…

This combo goes together like peanut butter and jelly or cancer and head scarfs, or jelly and cancer.

This bathroom doesn’t help if you already suffer from stage fright.

Fantasy football goes extreme.

Rare blue ducks will go extinct because the last two males decided to be gay for each other.

The point is is that too much with the is.

Oh to be in college again, hanging out in the Quad and being this guy.

Tonight you will pretend to be my prom date while I stroke my pet cat. Yeess.

Marco? Polo.

The next logical step in the escalating car campaign wars.

Me thinks this be a might effective crime deterrent.

I don’t want to think about the girls you’d meet at this hot new bar.