Troy
The gods have spoken: epic snoozer

// The skinny: The cinematic version of Homer's Illiad.

// Review: When Peter O'Toole said that he hated working with the director so much that he won't even watch the film that he starred in, that's bad. This movie was $185M and it looked like Sparticus only bigger; no great lighting, no interesting cinematography. Basically a cowardly lover not a fighter Paris (Olando Bloom) wisks the very lovely Helen away; the woman who launched a thousand ships, and the war is on. So you have the Trojans who are portrayed as refined cultured people, and the invading barbarian Spartans led by Achilles (Pitt).

/ The story revolves around the night and day contrasts between Hector (Eric Bana) and Achilles; noble verses savage. The main focus is on Achilles who is a glory mongering killing machine who is only gentled by of course, a woman. While the movie was big budgeted it wasn't grand. The armies were obviously CGI and the battles didn't evoke any type of visceral response. There wasn't much character development and the story was just plodding. The movie seemed to climax at the battle of Hector and Achilles. But you aren't even on the edge of your seat because it's so predictable and Hector is hopelessly outclassed. When the Trojan Horse comes into play it seems like an after thought like they are just going through the motions ala Pearl Harbor. And when will people stop giving Orlando Bloom work? He hurts my eyes watching him.

/ Probably the best part of the movie was the scene between O'Toole and Achilles. You had a fearless warrior who regualrly takes on incredible odds afraid not of a great ruler, but a fragile broken man. Just good acting.

// Wrap up: A 2.5 hour uninspired action/head nodder. I can't remember looking at a clock so many times during watching a movie. If you already thought Gladiator was awesome, next to this it will look...awesomer.

Entertainment rating: 2